i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
