we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I believe in your delicious
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
