She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.