I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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