So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
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