I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize