Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm too high and old for this...
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
