DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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