It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
