She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
