So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
