We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
