remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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