Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize