hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
