Pants 0. Shit 1.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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