This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale