i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
