what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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