We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
