just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
