plz talk dirty to me
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize