Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
