This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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