I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
