Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I just saw a hot homeless man
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
