I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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