Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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