I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
no you cant smoke seaweed
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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