I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
