So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
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Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
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U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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