I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Just invented taco cereal.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
