Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(857): View more from Massachusetts

I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.

(1-857): View more from Massachusetts

Doors?

(857): View more from Massachusetts

Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.

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(857): I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now. (1-857): Doors? (857): Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet. http://tfl.nu/ic4r

Replies (6) Good night (2085) Bad night (669)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit

(1-901): View more from Tennessee

no

(901): View more from Tennessee

the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table

(901): View more from Tennessee

im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE

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(901): pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit (1-901): no (901): the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table (901): im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE http://tfl.nu/q3wo

Replies (12) Good night (438) Bad night (1322)
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(813): View more from Florida

I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters

(1-813): View more from Florida

What is a male extremity?

(813): View more from Florida

i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex

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(813): I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters (1-813): What is a male extremity? (813): i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex http://tfl.nu/l9w1

Replies (35) Good night (684) Bad night (4643)
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(773): View more from Illinois

I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it

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(773): I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it http://tfl.nu/9cts

Replies (37) Good night (11246) Bad night (672)
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(301): View more from Maryland

The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.

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(301): The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs. http://tfl.nu/e9u8

Replies (28) Good night (3697) Bad night (671) Order T-Shirt
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(208): View more from Idaho

this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"

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(208): this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin" http://tfl.nu/odvv

Replies (16) Good night (7588) Bad night (861)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis

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(609): I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis http://tfl.nu/47d5

Replies (5) Good night (2447) Bad night (826) Order T-Shirt
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(615): View more from Tennessee

Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.

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(615): Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift. http://tfl.nu/yqhq

Replies (8) Good night (2275) Bad night (849) Order T-Shirt
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(847): View more from Illinois

no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.

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(847): no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them. http://tfl.nu/1ayu

Replies (1) Good night (1342) Bad night (515)
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(706): View more from Georgia

I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything

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(706): I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything http://tfl.nu/u65o

Replies (11) Good night (1273) Bad night (598) Order T-Shirt
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(529): View more from

Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.

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(529): Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble. http://tfl.nu/he57

Replies (10) Good night (536) Bad night (1461) Order T-Shirt
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(713): View more from Texas

It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution

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(713): It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution http://tfl.nu/g3ws

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(805): View more from California

I want "hickeys on my ass" sex

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(805): I want "hickeys on my ass" sex http://tfl.nu/gaw7

Replies (10) Good night (1672) Bad night (440) Order T-Shirt
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(651): View more from Minnesota

How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?

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(651): How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now? http://tfl.nu/kz7z

Replies (8) Good night (834) Bad night (328) Order T-Shirt
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(732): View more from New Jersey

Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.

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(732): Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age. http://tfl.nu/drps

Replies (5) Good night (1175) Bad night (539) Order T-Shirt

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