my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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