I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
