So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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