Got a toothbrush?
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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