fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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