physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
No subtext here. People are naked.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Randomize
