and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
