But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize