My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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