she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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