is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
