cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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