i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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