i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize