i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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