i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
