I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
We don't watch enough power rangers
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Randomize
