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he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
